Man In The Mirror

Some days ago, I was listening to the song "Man In The Mirror" by Micheal Jackson and it was basically saying that if you want a change to happen around you, it has to start with you making a change to yourself in favor of making this change around you, for example, one who wishes to stop corruption around him would be required to live a lifestyle free of corruption, because he is standing for something and he has to stand without wavering, even the bible says that it is either you are hot or cold, if you are Lukewarm, God would spit you out... but that isn't where I'm heading to.
As it would be, around the same time, I happened to be reading a book; "The five love languages" by Gary Chapman and he said something in his book; that you need to give your love to get love back... and it's even said that a giver of a thing can never lack that thing.
All of this made me remember a few weeks ago while I was in a meeting and the speaker was talking about leaving your comfort zone and she said that for you to get a different result in something, you have to change your mentality towards it.
My point is this, If you do not like the relationship you have with a person, change your mentality. If you are in a situation where there is no love between you and someone, then rather than wait for the change, be the change. If you're a man who is in love with a woman and you sit and wait for years for something to happen, rather than making it happen, sorry, not going to work, you have to take the initiative and make your feelings known and take steps to secure her heart, because she isn't going to get up one day and say "marry me" out of the blues. If you're someone with a terrible relationship with your parents, and you wish it were better, then take the first step and show them love and hope and pray that they will learn to do the same. If you're a parent with a troubled child and in your bid to help this child, he/she isn't receptive, work a better angle, with love and put more effort into it, and pray for the best.
Basically, if you love someone and you dislike the state of your relationship with said individual, then you have to take steps to change the state of that relationship, or the status, as the case may be. Express your love to your loved ones freely. You may have to leave your comfort zone and do or say things you are not exactly at ease with, but it's a small price to pay to have better relationships with loved ones. So take the initiative, give your love freely and leave your comfort zone and I believe that you will find all your relationships to be full of joy and happiness

Order versus Peace

I came to a realization about the laws that communities are often governed by and the general idea of the law and order system in most countries and communities.
This realization is that the system is one based on fear. A system where punishment is attached to guidelines or rather, disobedience of said guidelines.A system where everyone is made afraid of the consequences of particular actions so they rather not perform said actions, however, there are even greater fears than getting caught in a bad act. Fears that can consume a soul such as fear of death, poverty and most importantly insignificance. Even fears that one would see as minimal may rise up in some minds to consume them like fear of rejection, or more commonly referred to as peer pressure. While these consuming fears exist, there may be order sometimes and sometimes there may be anarchy, but peace will never reign, why? Because these people having these fears don't have an understanding.
Now, many countries decided while trying to come up with their laws that their foundation would be based on biblical laws and all well and good, but either there was never an understanding or along the line, understanding was misplaced, because we find that many people keep disobeying the laws, so much so that even the lawmakers no longer have respect for both the laws they themselves have laid down, and more importantly the laws their predecessors lay down before them. As a matter of fact, leaders in places like Nigeria now come up with laws based on a whim or a fleeting thought which is quite sad. Now, laws are written based on many different things while placing fear as a driving force for people to obey these laws but the main factor that is supposed to be the foundation for law-making has been lost along the line. The foundation of the biblical laws are no longer considered when said laws are being thought of.
According to my understanding of the bible and the laws in it, for example, the 10 commandments given in the old testament, they were given to the people of God and they were told to obey them to the letter, else they would find the consequences highly unfavorable. They never really understood the laws or why they had to obey them but they did and where they didn't, they would have to suffer.
However, in the new testament, Jesus was sent down and he gave us understanding and one commandment: To love. This understanding makes us realize that to love is to have God in you and also that when you have the love of God in you, these biblical laws will be a part of you. Now being that many countries decided to base their laws on these biblical laws, anyone who has the love of God in them will respect and abide by these laws at all times. I guess what I'm trying to say is that for peace to reign anywhere, the people have to unite under the cloak of the love of God. Only then can true peace reign in any place. My opinion.

True Beauty

The thing I realized about beauty is that it isn’t simple, it has multiple expressions and manifests in many wonderful ways. From the facial beauty to the artistic to the natural and of course the inner beauty.

I’m going to give a two quick scenarios so as to bring understanding of what I’m trying to say.

Scenario 1: You see someone for the first time and at first glance, it feels like you just fell in love, this person is so “beautiful” and you’re beginning to think, I have to know this person, he/she could be the one. But on getting an opportunity to experience who this person is, what you experienced doesn’t match the profile. Upon experiencing said person’s behavior several times, and after getting disappointed several times, the story changes, and who was once a beauty to you starts looking less beautiful, you start seeing every flaw he/she has and what was probably love at first sight becomes something much less.

Scenario 2: You see someone for the first time and at first glance, you don’t even take note of the person because, really, there is nothing fantastic to take note of. Now by chance, you happen to meet said person and upon meeting, you still see a random individual. After meeting this person, you happen to have a long conversation with him/her, thus enabling you to learn a little about who he/she is and you like the conversation and you make a mental note about this person like “not bad” or “he’s cool” or “she’s alright”. You then kick it off from there, and see each other regularly and you get the opportunity to know this person even more and you like who he/she is. As far as I know this person stops being “a random individual” and becomes that interesting friend and who you thought was nothing fantastic starts to look amazing to you and a glow begins to emanate from said person towards you. I call this the Inner Beauty Effect.

I have had these experiences several times and I didn’t get it at first but after some time thinking, it came to me. Anyone who is beautiful inside will find that their beauty will manifest, always. They may say that this person is ugly, but anyone who knows who he/she is will find themselves believing that this person is beautiful and the more you experience the person, the more beautiful they seem to be getting. I happen to know of someone who manages to get more and more beautiful, my mother.

Not just to me, but to everyone around her, she actually truly is physically beautiful, but what astonishes me is how she gets more beautiful, then it clicked, she’s beautiful inside. Now the question is how do you know who is beautiful inside, and the answer is simple, the beautiful people are those who have love in them and of course, we know that means having God in you because God is love. Love is the most beautiful thing ever and if you have it, you’re beautiful, at least, that is what I believe. The best part about it is the fact that the more you understand what love is, the more beautiful you become. 

So love and be beautiful because you are meant to be beautiful.

One Step At A Time

The thing I realized is that nothing good can be rushed into working or happening, and if you want something to work, you have to be patient and take steady and sure steps to make it work.
I find that we humans, once passionate about something or someone, we let our emotions lead us and we end up doing some rather stupid things that we ought not to do. When you care about something, you have to be patient about it and take conscious steps to make sure it works. Nothing rushed into ever works, you have to feel with your heart, talk with God then think with your head before taking any step, cuz when you care about something or someone, every step counts, so you can't afford to misstep. Our actions go a long way to define every situation, therefore, I believe that we must win every battle inside, by thinking, praying and feeling it through, before taking the step for real.
So whether it's a project you are embarking on, or a step to take in a relationship or if you're trying to get in a relationship, no matter the situation, feel, pray then think before acting... one step at a time, and believe me, its gonna happen if it's supposed to happen.
The race isn't for the swift, neither the battle for the strong!!!!
So remember, one step at a time, it does wonders!!!!!

Time Together

The last one week, I've found myself being rather busy, often being out and about, and although I have found myself in group fellowships with God more often than anywhere else, I found that the love was slowly dwindling... Why?
Was I unappreciative? No
Did I stop believing? Never... so what was the problem?
Very simple actually, although I spent time in his presence and worshiped and fellowship-ed in his presence regularly, I haven't taken time to just be with him, one on one, talk with him and just relish in the joy of being in his presence, and so because I haven't been doing this, the bond began to thin and at first, I didn't realize what was going on, until the problem extended to the regular group fellowship. So, I have decided to always have one on one time with the lover of my soul, so as to maintain the strong bond that I have with him.
That being said, if you are reading this, you should have already realized that even in our earthly relationships with loved ones, our bonds grow when we take time to talk one on one, because that is when a true connection between you and said loved one is achieved. And as compared to being in a group, having such "one on ones" enables us to speak to each other on much more intimate terms and this would build an even closer relationship between you and your loved ones. So try and take time to talk with your loved ones one on one, you'd be surprised the difference it could make.

True Talk or Being Naive

So a few months ago, my friends got into this argument about how their wives had to be very pretty and how after getting married, they would make sure she didn't gain weight or get out of physical shape basically and that if she did, they would lose interest instantly, and that when she would start looking old, they wouldn't be able to lay with her, and a lot of similar discussions were made that day.
I personally think along a much different line and some would say that I'm naive or that I'm just being overly optimistic, but i still think the way I do.
I think, first of all, that a marriage should be between two people who LOVE each other, a definition for love is in my very 1st post, they should love each other with the real love that is patient, kind, sees beyond the physical, it isn't self-seeking, it perseveres, always has hope, it isn't rude and it isn't proud. Reference to 1st Corinthians 13. I think love should stand the test of time, and falling in love should be a continuous, never ending roller-coaster of joy. I believe that if you fall in love with a 21 year old beautiful young lady, your feelings shouldn't change simply because she turned 50 and her hair turned gray and she gained 60 pounds or in the case of the ladies, your guy has the chest and 6 packs and few years after marriage, they are replaced by an unending sea of fat and you start thinking, "did i make the right choice?"
I remember this one time, a pastor said that he had been married to his wife for several years and that he was proud to say he still "liked" her because he felt it was impossible to stay in love with someone for a long period of time. That's his opinion, I'm not saying he is wrong, but I don't agree with him.
I think Love is about what is on the inside not the physical, maybe it's the truth, maybe I'm naive, but that is my take.

Appreciate What You Have...

The thing about appreciation is when you appreciate something you have, you find that it's value in your heart would increase.
But, Its funny how many of us lose sight of something beautiful right in front of us due to several possible elements affecting us, whether internally or externally, but our judgements basically end up clouded and we end up taking the wrong steps, and we don't end up realizing what we've done until it's too late.
If We can't learn to appreciate the wonderful things in our lives, then i don't think we deserve any of them, If we can't just step back for a moment and make ourselves realize the beauty in our lives, no matter how small it may be, it really sucks, cuz I find it always fulfilling when I can sit back and look around me and see how beautiful my life is, and honestly, i just start smiling.
You should always remember to appreciate who or what you have, and more importantly, you should remember to appreciate the love you have, between you and your mother or father or brother or sister or boyfriend or girlfriend or husband or wife or friends. Never let that love be compromised and never forget to appreciate it, cuz it matters, and always let them know how much you love them and how happy you are to... love them.
But most importantly, we should never forget to appreciate the holder of our everything, the very one who gave us the love we have, I emphasise this because I think the best thing he gave us was love, and he gave it to all and freely. Appreciate him all day, everyday cuz frankly, no words can describe how wonderful he is and how much he has expressed his love to us... no words can explain his love, but i one word, i'd say... beautiful, that's what it is. Appreciate him, so maybe one day, your love can be perfect.
So always appreciate who and what you have, and most importantly, appreciate God.

A Loving Soul or Just Plain Stupidity

Being in love is one of the best experiences in life, especially when it is a mutual love, but alas, human nature is so evil, and people make mistakes, and I wish to see people's reactions to these mistakes.
A scenario; A young couple in the University, deeply in love with each other and truly a perfect couple, they had confessed their love to each other, but a twist of fate;
After a period of time, they had to spend some time apart, and after awhile, the young woman fell to the temptation of another young man, and slept with him. Although she did this horrible thing, it didn't take away the fact that she truly loved her boyfriend.
She eventually came clean to her boyfriend and apologized and promised to never do such a thing again, now, heartbroken, he was faced with an emotional dilemma; deal with the pain and forgive her, or throw her out of his life forever. I personally think that if he truly loves her, he would forgive her and forget the horrible act she did, because true love is forgiving, or am I just talking like a plainly stupid person???
                                                                                                                                             T.I.L

Book of the Week: Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers

This is a book inspired by the book of Hosea in the bible and it is set in the 1850's in California
The whole concept of the book is to try to depict the redeeming love of God to sinners and how he expects us to be towards each other as he is towards us. It really shows through Micheal Hosea's dedication to what God wanted of him and his expression of love towards someone who many would reject and cast out, a person who ended up being his wife.
The story starts with a beautiful young girl, Sarah, who meets her father for the first time at the age of seven and finds out that she is the result of an adulterous affair between her already married father Alex Stafford and her mother and realizes that her father never wanted her, making her dislike him, wishing that she would never have to see him again.
Later that year, her father decided that he wanted to see her mother, Mae. Mae, being very much in love with Stafford made arrangements for her maid to take Sarah away while Stafford would be around.Cleo, the maid, took Sarah with her into a popular brothel where Cleo was well-known and had a male companion. After getting drunk she agreed to sleep with him. After this, the man leaves Cleo heartbroken again, Cleo in a half-drunk stupor told Sarah "God's truth" and forced a frightened Sarah to listen to her say that no man ever cares for a woman and all they want is sex.
Eventually, Stafford leaves them completely, and without his support, Mae became panicked and they eventually had to relocate to a shack on the docks where Mae became a prostitute. After several years, Mae came down with a severe illness and on her dying bed, she entrusted the life of her child to a drunk of a man, Rab.
Rab, not knowing what to do with a small child went searching for a way out and soon found a man whose master was looking to adopt a little girl and he quickly gathered Sarah up and took her to the mansion. Upon getting there, Rab was strangled right in front of Sarah, then the master of the house, Duke who turns out to be a pedophile gives her a new name, Angel. He tells her there is much to teach her then he gives her his very first "lesson" that night.
After several years, Angel escapes Duke, only to fall into prostitution at the brothel of a woman named Duchess.
It is at this place that Micheal Hosea, a farmer gets his first glance of the wife God has chosen for him, while trying to sell his produce at the shop close to the brothel...
To get the rest of the story, how Hosea had to fight to win the hard heart of his wife, and how she eventually learns to love him back, go read the book!!!!!
This story is packed with so much emotion, it'll bring many to tears, and others close.
This book is a must read!!!!
                                                                                                                                   T.I.L

LOVE

It's not just that sweet gooey feeling you get inside you when you see that special someone, it isn't just the lingering memory of him/her that keeps you awake late into the night, it isn't just about holding hands, calling each other boyfriend/girlfriend, smiling and staring each other in the eyes intently... It's about the feelings behind these things, the joy you feel around that person, the constant need to be around him/her, the fact that just hearing his/her name makes you smile, it's about sharing trust and faith in each other, about caring for each other and continually wanting to know everything about this person, being each other's best friends.
Despite all this description, the truth is this, Love is an experience that cannot be explained, whether by written word, song, movie or any other medium, but the truth is, its the best thing in this world. Nothing can compare to it, and a true understanding and experience of it can only come from one medium, God.
I speak freely as a Christian and therefore a lover that as his creations, we all have his love in us, in our souls and it's manifestation is the best thing you can ever experience. Love is eternal, full of hope and trust, it beautifies and strengthens the soul. It is the perfect force for good and it's something everyone deserves to experience. This is just an unrefined 1st post, telling you how I feel.

                                                                                                                               T.I.L
P.S Shout out to Gilbert and Olamide, keep the love real!!!